Do we deserve democracy or does democracy deserve us?

Striving for democracy seems to be the most important social goal for Iranian intellectuals. However, in practical debate, people have serious doubts about the possibility and the consequences of this project. Here are some related questions:
Are Iranian mature enough to choose their destiny and tolerate each other's freedom? Aren't we going to face ethnic unrest by opening up the society?
Aren't we going to sacrifice short term economic development by practicing a newborn democracy? Isn't this situation going to act against itself?
These are some important questions which should be addressed by any democracy advocate. Our answers depend on how we define democracy and how we view today's Iranian culture and society. We don't have to completely agree or disagree with a democracy project for Iran; however, we have to decide where we stand and how far we want to go...

Iranian dissidents and the States

Two weeks ago I was caught up in a heated argument about the earlier meeting in the white house that day. Some thirty Iranian political activists attended a whit house meeting hosted by top U.S. officials including the National Security Council's Elliot Abrams and State Department's Iran nuclear negotiator Nicholas Burns ( NYSUN report ) . Later that day, I attended a dinner party in honor of famous Iranian dissident Akbar Ganjee. Most of the crowd that night was against the white house meeting;they were assuming that Iran and the US interests are mutually exclusive. ..What If we are convinced that the states' and Iran's interests at this historical period are not contradicting each other; if so, couldn't Iranian political activists play an informative role and act as a voice for Iranians' interests by attending such a meetings?